Inside This Mind.

06.18.2005 * 11:21 a.m.
pieces of me.

My fingers are clutching the empty space beside me, seeking the strong hand that made them feel safe when they were intertwined with its warmth. My eyes are searching vacant rooms for their mirror images in those matching orbs that I could stare into for hours. My ears are straining to catch the lingering echo of the laughter that sparked a gentle fire in my soul. They're reaching to hear the voice that, when carefully speaking my name, can send shivers up my spine. My heart continues beating, but I wonder how it maintains a steady rhythm while it's so far away from the heart that sets its pace.

But the days carry on, and I move with them.

06.18.2005 * 1:59 a.m.
it's been one long long week.

My hair is shorter, it falls to about my chin and is layery around my face. I actually paid money to get it cut this time, so you it must be good. I don't know what the general consensus is, but I think I look pretty hot.

This afternoon I locked myself out of my apartment for the first time. Of course, I do it when I'm the only one of my roommates in town. I immediately broke in (which was frightfully easy) because it's hard to drive away when your keys are locked inside your home. Go me.

Hope Ranch and I have become friends these past few months. With all of the driver's training and exploring, then dinner tonight at one of my friend's house-sitting houses, I feel like the residents should let me hang out there permanently. They've all got at least one guest bedroom per property so I could be accommadated. Besides, I don't take up much space.

Downtown Ventura isn't terribly exciting. A group of people went down there for a concert in a 21 and over club. One of our friends is not even twenty yet, so I opted to wander the streets with him while everyone else went to the show. I've seen Vertical Horizon in concert before, so I didn't mind missing this performance. Jesse and I walked across a bridge over the highway and then out on the Ventura pier. It's not much different than the Goleta pier at night, lots of people fishing and whatnot. I could have gone without seeing all of the couples making out though. Seriously people! Do you have to rub it in? sigh...

On the drive home my all-time favorite Weezer song, "Say It Ain't So" came on the radio and reflex kicked in. The volume went up, the window went down, the singing at the top of my lungs commenced. That's the only proper way to listen to the Blue Album.

My legs are tired. I should have crawled into bed an hour ago. I'm a silly girl.

(And I miss you. Terribly.)