07.21.2005 * 6:48 p.m.
ONE.
And then I found this:
07.21.2005 * 12:32 p.m.
take a look around.
For the past several months I've been trying to read the news regularly to become more than the ignorant American I have always been. The experience has been rather informative thus far and I do enjoy acquiring new knowledge. My problem with it is that the world is falling apart and the news is depressing. I love to read the science, health and technology sections because I'm a nerd. However, the big headlines, the pictures of starving children in poor nations, the amber alerts and child molestations, the kidnappings and murders of political diplomats, the bombings and attempted bombings, the wars, the bloodshed, the ecological destruction of our earth, are really starting to bring me down.
I guess that is what happens when I decide to educate myself and open my eyes.
07.20.2005 * 7:23 p.m.
Thick sticky air leads to inhaler use which causes shaky arms.
I've been wanting to write in here off and on all day. I start entries, type a few lines, stop, erase, try again. My topics have been trite and meaningless, shallowly scraping the surface of my thoughts. These almost-entries carefully avoided digging deep enough to hit the reality of my feelings. I don't want to be repetitive, I don't want to bore the world with the constant recitation of one name, but one name keeps resounding through me. Being in this town where he and I were constantly together makes me painfully aware of his absence.
I'm doing very well. I've been getting stuff done and having a good time, laughing and smiling. Really. I'm happy. But I am missing him.