Inside This Mind.

02.23.2006 * 10:24 p.m.
tomorrow makes 37.

I don't remember what I came here to write tonight.
I know that the chlorine in my hair means everything to me. That the tire marks on the street in front of my house make me smile each time I see them. I know that I have been blessed by the people placed in my life, then and now. That my Heavenly Father has helped me meet the people who effect me most. I know that I love my girls, here and there.
I know that a moment of silence is worth a thousand words.

02.22.2006 * 4:18 p.m.
I bought a sleeping bag.

Life is a flash of vibrant color zipping past my face.
The energy of kindergarteners is contagious. Their laughter and smiles delight me to no end. Their frowns and tears break my heart. The sweet phrase, "Miss Hackett, will you read this book to me?" is music to my ears.
The energy in my college classes is severely lacking. The lectures are designed to lull me to sleep. The assignments are created to fill my minutes with busy work. I am learning, but I could learn just as much in shorter classes. Precious time is constantly being wasted and stress levels are constantly elevating.

Life is a song of gentle vibrations whispering against my skin.
The energy I feel with this cowboy is perfectly complicated. In his arms I am laughter and dancing eyes, calm breathing, restful mind, relaxation personified. Out, on his arm, I am something else; running wild, strangely quiet, uncertainly assured.

I can't explain myself. I've tried but can't make sense of a thing. That's okay though, I don't want to waste my time explaining my life away. I'm just going to live it instead.

(The Spaniard is now a Zone Leader. Where do I sign up to have his babies? (Is it wrong to talk about a missionary that way?) I respect that kid so much.)